Oct 29, 2008
There’s a lot of talk about what you should do to become successful, but I would argue that it’s more about who you are that makes the biggest impact. It’s the decisions we make on a daily basis, the habits we naturally form in our lives that determine the level of success we can achieve. Who we are determines how we react to life, even when we’re not consciously in the act of ‘being successful’.
So here are 10 traits that I’ve seen as essential for obtaining lasting success in any endeavor.
If we rely too much on those around us for assistance and/or support we will be setting ourselves up for disappointment in the future. This is not to say that we shouldn’t look to others for help when the time is right, but crafting our pursuits in such a way that requires the intervention of another is like handing over the keys and getting in the back seat. Our friends and colleagues may help open the doors of opportunity, but it is our own responsibility to take the wheel.
Every decision we make in life will have some kind of effect on future outcomes. If our choices our filtered through fear and doubt, we can be assured of the life we are trying to avoid. Trust your instincts and listen to your heart. When you make a mistake, don’t look at it as reason for doubt, but instead, realize the opportunity for wisdom as you continue to push ahead.
It’s been few years since I've been in my current business. Years of long hours and hard work. Many times did I consider throwing in the towel when things didn’t go my way. But every year that’s gone by, every road block I’ve pushed through, my work has grown as my resolve to make it a success has strengthened. Persistence is not an optional trait for those who desire success, but an essential attitude that must be embraced!
When I think of some of the greatest ‘achievers’ in history I see great innovators and people of purpose. Names like Henry Ford, Walt Disney and Bill Gates come to mind. From cars to cartoons to computers, their personalities were as diverse as their pursuits. But one thing they share is the wonderful ability to see what’s not yet visible to the naked eye. It was the imagination of Henry Ford that first painted the picture of a car in every garage, and Bill Gates, a computer in every home. And it was Walt Disney who continues to inspire millions with the idea that ‘anything is possible’.
Those with inevitable success can see the unseen. They’ve become successful in their minds before they laid their first brick.
I’m a people pleaser at heart and can be devastated by disappointment. But as a necessity in business, I’ve grown a thick skin that allows me to deflect defeat while maintaining my focus. Whether in corporate conflict or the liabilities of life, it is those with a strong armor who will maintain their momentum.
If you don’t know who you are, you will never truly know what you’re capable of. It is in our daily pursuits that we need accurate information on our strengths and weaknesses to succeed. Because being blind sided by your own inability or missing out on your true talents will bring nothing more than failure and frustration.
Continuing with the analogy of Ford, Disney and Gates, we can see three individuals with very clear intentions. No one ever questioned Ford’s intentions of filling the roads with his Model T’s. Disney was never far from his pursuits of capturing our imaginations. And even when no one believed in his dream of populating every home with a PC, there was never a question of Gates greatest goal.
There’s a lot of talk about multi-tasking and single tasking when it comes to getting things done. But however you go about accomplishing your goals, focus must be at the core of your character. Successful people have the knack for deflecting distraction and keeping their nose to the grindstone. It is our drive that pushes us forward and keeps our momentum, but without focus we will just be moving for the sake of motion.
Many of the traits mentioned thus far would not be possible without this key ingredient. Without being able to constantly see the cup as half full, we would never be able to stay focused. Being blind to that silver lining would paralyze our persistence. So it is absolutely crucial that our minds maintain a positive outlook on life and never give in to the destruction of defeat. Optimism is at the heart of a successful human being!
Success can be obtained by many, but maintaining the drive to reach our goals requires a passion for pursuit and a lust for life. We can create a to-do list and set our goals with the best of them, but without this necessary habitual hunger, we will most certainly fail to bring to the table the results we imagined.
Oct 9, 2008
What does Neuro-Linguistic Programming (NLP) mean anway?
If NLP is touted today as the biggest thing to hit personal development since sliced bread, what does its funky name mean anyway?
Neuro refers to our nervous system, that’s the hardwiring inside our body that helps control the bits and pieces, linguistic refers to language, verbal and non-verbal, and programming combines the two to study how language programs us and vice versa.
Who Made It And How?
In the 1970s, a couple of strappling young men Richard Bandler and John Grinder did a study of some of the most effective therapists of their time. They sought out to find if they could model what it was that these therapeutic wizards did so well, so that they could produce the same results and pass on the methods to others.
From the study of these geniuses, they created a meta-tool in which other models could be made, and a guiding structure of useful beliefs and frameworks. Thus, the study of subjective experience and modeling excellence was born.
But I’m Not A Therapist, What Can NLP Do For Me?
First off, the original tools modeled from these therapists is already pretty powerful stuff.
For example, the Milton and Meta model, specific language patterns modeled after the father of modern hypnotherapy, Milton Erickson, and the foremost family therapist of her time, Virginia Satir, give us a very useful model for understanding and using language precisely to increase influence and direct change.
And now, 30 years odd on, NLP has gone on to model top salesmen, athletes, geniuses, leaders, musicians, and whatnots, and created specific techniques and models to re-create what it is they do that makes them do it so well so you can do it too, with useful tips, techniques and beliefs for powerful persuasion, emotional control, releasing of limiting beliefs, aligning your identity, memorizing names, creative planning and so on.
Wait A Minute, That Sounds A Bit Too Impossible
It’d be the height of silliness for anyone to believe that by modeling the genius of Albert Einstein, we could think exactly as he thought and create the next big theory of everything.
And may demons of stupidity be cast out of any NLPer who claims to do so!
NLPers are pragmatic by nature. When a new model or technique is created out of the ashes of genius, the question isn’t ‘is it accurate?’ but rather ‘is it useful?’. We can’t re-create the genius of Einstein in our own heads, but we can create useful models from studying his thinking processes to enhance our own.