Mar 21, 2009

- How we are deceived by our own miscalculations of the future

Harvard psychologist Dan Gilbert says our beliefs about what will make us happy are often wrong -- a premise he supports with intriguing research, and explains in his accessible and unexpectedly funny book, Stumbling on Happiness.

1 comment:

GREEN said...

Somewhere along the line of development we discover what we really are, and then we make our real decision for which we are responsible. Make that decision primarily for yourself because you can never really live anyone else's life."
-- Eleanor Roosevelt

Mind is what your brain does consciously. Our minds perform a series of information processing in order to form strategies needed to live our daily lives. This process is known as decision making. However, aside from making decisions, because of many kinds of uncertainties we also face a problem called decidophobia, which is the fear of making the wrong decisions combined with nervous agitation. Moreover, fear of judgement by others is a sure path to unhappiness which is a state of mind.

Decisions are at the heart of success, and at times there are critical moments when they can be difficult, perplexing, and nerve racking.

A decision usually involves three steps:
1. A recognition of a need: A dissatisfaction within oneself--a void or need;
2. A decision to change--to fill the void or need;
3. A conscious dedication to implement the decision

We all know the difference between "right" and "wrong", and we can tell "good from "bad". But we also know that the more difficult decisions come when we have to choose between good and better. The toughest decisions of all are those we have to make between bad and worse.

Many people believe that predetermined destiny rather than their own decisions govern the affairs of their lives. Personal mastery teaches us to choose.

Choosing is a courageous act that entails opting for various courses of actions that will define one's destiny. Destiny is not a matter of chance. It is a matter of choice.

Be realistic about your abilities. When there is a way, there is a will. The opposite is not true as many people unfortunately believe and have taken as the basis for decisions concerning their personal life. Thinking about strategies to strive after that are beyond your abilities can ruin your life.

There are many factors that contribute to being a good decision-maker, the cardinal ones are:
1-Self-esteem (not pride): Self-esteem is a big factor in making good decisions

2-Courage, Courage is doing what you are afraid to do. There can be no courage unless you are scared. Courage is to think for your self.

4-Of all the gifts that a parent can give a child, the gift of learning to make good choices is the most valuable and long lasting.

5-Honesty: Honesty is to be the one you are. Be objective about yourself and others. It is important to identify your weaknesses as well as your strengths. Being honest with yourself is the most important thing you can ever do

6-Love: Love means caring about yourself and other people. It means that you go to sleep at night knowing that your talents and abilities were used in making decisions that, served others. The wonderful thing about love is that it embraces, without binding.

Have a very clear picture of what you want out of life and what it will take to get it. There is a popular, classic song in which a raspy female voice exclaims to her independent female audience, "use what you get what you want."

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